Noel Gallagher 50句經典語錄(上)

Noel Gallagher 50句經典語錄(上)

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前綠洲樂團吉他手 Noel Gallagher 剛過完他的47歲生日,並且在官方推特上放上他在錄音室彈唱的照片,讓樂迷相當期待他的第二張個人專輯。出道至今,Noel Gallagher 一直話鋒犀利,不但左打弟弟 Liam Gallagher,也右打不少樂團和歌手,言詞中也不乏許多笑點。為此 NME 雜誌擷錄了50個他在各訪談中非常有趣的談話內容,顯示他獨特的世界觀及幽默感。

 

 

1. On being a roadie: “I look back on those days as some of the best of my life. No photographs, no interviews. Just get up in the morning, make sure the gear works, do the gig and then fucking party.”

論再度巡演:回顧之前那幾天真是我人生中最棒的部分。既沒有拍攝行程,也沒有專訪。一早醒來確定設備都正常後,就是弄場爽翻天的演唱會。

“根據維基:Gallagher began learning guitar at the age of thirteen. After a series of odd jobs in construction, he worked for local Manchester band Inspiral Carpets as a roadie and technician in 1988. Whilst touring with them, he learned that his brother Liam Gallagher had formed a band of his own, known as The Rain, which eventually took on the name Oasis. After Gallagher returned to England, he was invited by his brother to join Oasis as songwriter and guitarist.”
由以上維基說明, Gallagher 在成名前曾是受雇於家鄉的樂隊 Inspiral Carpets 擔任 roadie.

On being a roadie: 關於擔任roadie工作的回憶:  回顧之前那些日子真是我人生中最棒的部分。既沒有拍攝行程,也沒有專訪。一早醒來確定設備都正常後,就是弄場爽翻天的演唱會。
網友指正: Roadie 指的是演唱會隨行工作人員,為完全正解.謹訂正 主編:凌威

 

 

 

2. On NME:“If you see an NME journalist at any of the gigs (and let’s face it, they’re pretty easy to spot; they don’t stray far from hospitality, wear God-awful clothes – particularly the shoes – got dreadful hair and that kind of “mug me” look about them), give ’em a clip round the earhole from me and tell ’em to behave.”

對於 NM E雜誌: 如果你看到任何演唱會上的 NME 記者(老實說他們有夠好認的!人假掰又穿著很鳥的衣服,尤其是鞋子,髮型也很鳥,一副讓人度淡的樣子!)幫我勸他們改改吧!

 

 

3, On ageing: “I don’t stay up for two or three days on end, fuckin’ talking shit about aliens, but I’m becoming more of a belligerent old man, you know what I mean? It’s the usual. When you get to a certain age you find that other people’s opinions don’t really matter anymore, and you get kind of uncomfortable with your place in modern life.”

論老年: 我才不會為了一些外星人的屎事熬夜熬個兩三天,但我絕對會是支老大砲,你懂嗎?這很稀鬆平常,到了一定的年紀你就會發現人們的看法已經不太重要,而對於現狀你也就開始覺得不適應了。

 

 

4, On frivolous purchases: “I had built for me a customized 1967 Mark II Jaguar convertible at a cost of £110,000, and I haven’t got a driving license. It’s useless to me.”

論買奢侈品: 我曾經花了五百多萬訂製一台 1967 年的 Mark II Jaguar 敞篷車,可是我沒駕照。一點屁用都沒有。

 

 

5, On ambition: “You want to sell 5,000 limited-edition red vinyl seven-inches, that’s fine. Make music for a closet full of people in Bradford somewhere … but it doesn’t mean anything to anyone. Phil Collins has got to be chased out of the charts, and Wet Wet Wet. It’s the only way to do it, man, to fucking get in there among them and stamp the fuckers out.”

論企圖心:你想賣 五千 張限定的 7 吋紅膠唱片,沒問題,只要做音樂給布拉德福德市(註:當地古典音樂盛行)的人聽就好了! 可是這對任何人一點意義都沒有。唯一的方法是要把菲爾柯林斯和 wet wet wet 合唱團從排行榜上踢走,打進音樂市場把那些混帳消滅啊,老兄。

 

 

6, On his funeral: “I’m not really bothered ’cause I won’t be there. I don’t give a shit.”

對於他的葬禮:死了都死了還想什麼? 我才不管那麼多!

 

 

7, On his guitar playing: “I’m average at fucking best.”

論他的吉他演奏: 我他媽的是水準之上!

 

 

8, On the death of guitar music: “They’ve been saying it for 30 years, ever since The Beatles split up, you know, that rock’n’roll’s dead. When ever there’s a boom there’s always a bit of a lull afterwards. I suppose that avant garde punk rock will come back for a while, and it will all be shit again, and then guitar music will come back.”

對於吉他音樂之死: 自從披頭四解散後,他們講搖滾樂已死已經講了三十年。有盛就有衰。我想前衛龐克搖滾也會復甦一陣子,然後又變成一堆垃圾! 接著就是吉他音樂又流行回來了。

 

 

9, On life on tour: “Got thrown out of a taxi this morning. At least I think I did. Hard to tell over here. There was shouting and pointing and then the international hand signal for ‘Get the fuck out of my cab, you western dog!’”

關於巡演生活: 今天早上就被趕出計程車了! 是什麼事我就不多說了,反正就是一個國際性的手勢和被嚷嚷著: 他媽的滾出我的車,你這臭老外!

 

 

10, On the press: “Well, they’re just waiting for us to make some monumental f—up, and they hope to be around when it happens. We’ve got to get one step ahead of those fellows.”

關於媒體報導: 簡單來說就是記者一直等我們弄些經典的屎事出來,然後繞著我們團團轉。而我們總是能給他們所需要的。

 

 

11, On regrets: “I wish we’d let ‘(What’s the Story) Morning Glory?’ settle and go away. It was still Number 5 in the Billboard 100 when we started making ‘Be Here Now’. I wish someone who’s paid to be bright and clever had told us to go away and do a bit of living.”

論後悔:我希望我們能讓”(What’s the Story) Morning Glory?” 這張專輯留在過去,就此打住。當我們在做 ‘Be Here Now’ 專輯時,標示榜的百大名單中它還在第五名。我挺希望有伯樂要我們拋開專輯的成功,繼續新的音樂創作。

 

 

12, On the possibility of a live album: “We’re going to do a live album when I run out of ideas for songs, or if Liam starts writing Oasis songs (ha ha ha).”

關於現場專輯的可能性: 這會發生在我沒有寫歌靈感,或是 Liam 開始寫綠洲的歌(笑)

 

 

13, On Kaiser Chiefs ‘being wankers’: “Well, they are, though. The worst thing about them is that they’re not very good. They play dress-up and sit on top of an apex of meaninglessness. They don’t mean anything to anybody apart from their fucking ugly girlfriends.”

對於 Kaiser Chief 是白癡: 完全就是啊! 最糟糕的莫過於他們真的沒那麼厲害。只是裝的很像有那麼一回事,可是又不知道自己在幹嘛。崇拜 Kaiser Chiefs 的只有他們的醜馬子。

 

 

14, On playing guitar: “It’s a human playing a tree. Three chords on a guitar: now write a song. I only know 11! But I tell you what, God help you when I find the 12th!”

論彈吉他: 渾然天成的事情。用 3 個和絃寫成一首歌。我只知道 11 和絃。但我告訴你,願上帝保佑你當我發現 12 和絃的時候 !

 

 

15, On drugs: “If there were gold medals for taking drugs for England I would have won a shitload.”

論嗑藥: 如果在英格蘭嗑藥可以拿金牌,我絕對封王。

 

 

16, On the music: “Writing songs, that’s what gets me going. Not the drugs or the sex or the rock’n’roll behaviour, it’s the music.”

對於音樂: 寫歌就是我的動力。跟嗑藥,性愛或搖滾樂一點關係也沒有。就只是音樂。

 

 

17, On Jay-Z: “What did I think of Jay-Z doing ‘Wonderwall’? It was pretty funny. But I’m not sure one should be seen in public with a white Stratocaster.”

論 Jay-z : 我覺得 Jay-z 唱 wonderwall 會怎樣? 還蠻搞笑的。不過我不太確定一個拿著白色 Stratocaster 的人該不該像這樣在大庭廣眾下拋頭露臉的。

 

 

18, On Keane: “I feel sorry for Keane. No matter how hard they try they’ll always be squares. Even if one of them started injecting heroin into onto his cock people would go ‘Yeah but your dad was a vicar, good night’.”

對於 Keane : 我對於 Keane 感到遺憾。不管他們再怎麼做都還是一樣。縱使他們裡面有人嗑藥,大家還是會說「是喔? 不過你爸是牧師耶! 好了,洗洗早點睡吧!」

 

 

19, On moshpits: “It seems like you’ve got these gigs where it’ll be the front three rows of people in this big massive hole but there’s geezers running around, punching each other…singing like Live Forever’…totally missing the point.”

關於演唱會樂迷衝撞文化: 演唱會上前三排的人在人群圍成的大窟窿裡,唱著 Live Forever 又一邊跑來跑去、東撞西撞的話,真的是完全搞錯看演唱會的重點。

 

 

20, On brotherly relations: “I like to think I keep it real. Liam keeps it surreal, and somewhere between the two we get on all right.”
論兄弟關係: 我看待事情是實際面的。Liam是看成超現實的。有時候我們在當中反而取得平衡。

 

 

21, On the worst possible psychological torture: “Being sat beside Liam on a 15-hour flight. It happened just the once, going to Japan or somewhere. It’s just horrible.”

關於最崩潰的時候: 在飛機上坐 Liam 旁邊坐了 15 個小時,不知道是去日本還是哪裡,真要我老命。

 

 

22, On global warming: “You can’t blame rock stars for global warming when the Chinese, the Indians and the Americans have been pumping out shit into the atmosphere for the last 100 years.”

論全球暖化: 你不能在中國人,印度人和美國人已經排廢氣排了將近 100 年的時候,把這屎盆子扣在搖滾歌手的頭上。

 

 

23, On free downloads: “I’m not giving my records away for free. If nobody fuckin’ buys them then… They’re not going out for free.”

關於免費下載: 我的專輯沒有免費這件事。如果沒人買就…..還是不會免費。

 

 

24, On Liam: “He’s rude, arrogant, intimidating and lazy. He’s the angriest man you’ll ever meet. He’s like a man with a fork in a world of soup.”

論弟弟 Liam : 他就是個集粗魯,傲慢,具威脅性和懶惰於一身的人。而且絕對是你見過最暴躁的人。完全就是個無路用的傢伙。

 

 

25, On the Beckhams: “Why is Posh Beckham writing a fucking book of her memoirs? she can’t even chew chewing gum and walk in a fucking straight line at the same time, let alone write a book.”

對於貝克漢一家: 那個高貴辣妹出什麼鬼回憶錄啊?她連邊吃口香糖邊走直線都有問題了,還出書咧!

 

 

圖與原文均來自NME
翻譯by Ami.W

後續 : Noel Gallagher 50 句經典語錄 (下)

 

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